When you stumbled across the text message between your spouse and a mutual friend of yours, you didn't think much of it at first. It seemed to suggest a planned meeting to transfer some money. You asked your spouse about it later and were a bit taken aback at the defensive reaction that ensued. As you thought it over again later, you realized it was not the first strange issue that's popped up since you filed for divorce.
Every California family is different. Kids have different needs and parents have different work schedules. No two families are the same, and for this reason, no two custody orders should be the same. For many families, traditional custody plans do not suit their needs.
The decisions that parents make can have life-long effects on their children. As a parent, you certainly want to do your best to ensure that those influences are positive rather than negative, but you also cannot avoid every potential scenario that could leave your children feeling down. When it comes to divorce, the choice to end the marriage may be the best for everyone involved, but you will likely still worry when it comes time to make child custody decisions.
When navigating divorce, California parents know that one of the most complex aspects of the process will be any issue related to child custody. It is natural to have concerns over what will happen to your child, and parents often feel out of control over what will happen to their relationship with their children.
For some, the realization that their marriage is over comes easily. Perhaps they have a deal-breaker mentality that makes it easy to know when a spouse has crossed the line. You may be like others, however, for whom walking away from a commitment like marriage is a painful, difficult decision. Even when outsiders can see the unhappiness in your marriage, you may want to hold on a little longer.
Depending on your experience, you may have already overcome some fairly stressful challenges in life. Some types of situations seem to be stressful by nature, such as divorce. There aren't many people in California or anywhere who make it all the way through the divorce process with zero obstacles arising. In fact, if you do, you should probably write a book on the topic because others will want to know your secret.
As you ease into a new lifestyle with your children after divorce, you will likely face a few challenges. Each of your children might react differently to the situation, one becoming more reclusive, and perhaps, another a bit more rebellious. There's no one way to deal with the emotional roller coaster that often accompanies the divorce process. Any major change in life can be difficult. Your children's lives will never be the same, and they may struggle to come to terms with it all.
If the past holiday season left you feeling confused because of recent changes in your family, you are not alone. Like many in California and across the country, you may be a stepparent in a family with numerous stepparents, stepchildren and half-siblings. Across the country, in about one third of all families with parents under the age of 55, at least one parent is a step.
When you filed the papers to end your marriage in a California court, you knew your decision was affecting children's lives as well as your own. Hopefully, through thoughtful discussions and by keeping lines of communication open, you'll be able to help them over any bumps that arise on their pathways toward a new family lifestyle. There are certain issues that seem to be most prevalent among children of divorced parents. Knowing what these are ahead of time may help you to better help them.
When you first started thinking about getting divorced, you may have immediately begun to worry about the potential costs of such endeavors. While you realized that there are other issues as or more important than money, you have also always been a practical thinker; thus, it seemed only logical to think and plan ahead. Perhaps a few of your friends suggested that you try a do-it-yourself style divorce. You took to the idea right away because it sounded like a big money-saver.